4 Kind and Helpful Things to Say to Your Sober Friend.

If you have a friend who is fighting addiction, substance abuse, or is even successfully sober, this is for you! Recovery takes on many different shapes and forms. 

Your friend might even be in recovery from something that isn’t substance-related like an eating disorder or from past trauma. 

Either way, you are here on our blog because you want to be supportive and helpful! 

We applaud you for wanting to be a good friend and are happy to lend a helping hand. 

If you don’t have experience in the recovery world, you likely feel like you don’t know what to say and when to say it. 

That’s okay! 

We’re here to give you a few tips. 

  1. For when your friend has been increasingly distant.

Often, when someone in recovery is struggling they will create distance between themselves and those closest to them. If you feel like that’s happening, don’t panic. 

The last thing they’ll want is an overload of messages. 

Try this: “Hi friend, I know that you’ve been taking some time for yourself lately. I just wanted to let you know that your progress has not gone unnoticed and I’m so proud of the work, time, and effort you’ve devoted to living your best life! XO, your friend.”

  1. For when your friend reaches a milestone. 

Even though a milestone is a big deal, too much praise can put pressure on your friend. For this, you’ll want to take their lead. 

If they seem excited, then be excited with them! If they are wanting to keep things low-key, offer to have a small dinner or movie night. 

Celebration looks different for everyone, so respect their wishes and do your best to help them feel celebrated! 

Tip: You can still write a mushy card if you want to be extra supportive! 

  1. For when your friend has a slip-up. 

With this scenario, again, you’ll want to take their lead. 

Everyone reacts differently to relapse. It’s a very personal and often traumatic experience. As a friend, the best thing you can do is just be there for support when needed. 

Try this: “Hi friend, just checking in on you. I wanted to remind you that your progress is not lost, and the work you’ve put in still matters. I’ve seen you make tremendous improvements towards reaching your goals. Whatever you need, I’ve got your back. I believe in you.”

  1. For when your friend needs a gentle reminder. 

A kind note goes a long way! Have you ever received an uplifting text message out of the blue? It’s the best feeling! You can change someone’s entire day or week by doing this. 

You can send a gentle reminder at any time. Generally, you’ll want to do two things - acknowledge their progress and encourage them to keep going. 

Here are two examples: 

Try this: Hi friend, just writing to let you know what a light you’ve been in my life! I’m so proud of the growth I’ve seen from you lately and can’t wait to see you keep shining this year. Love, your friend. 

Try this: Hi friend, I’m popping in your inbox to say that you’re a rockstar and I’m so proud to call you my friend. Keep doing what you’re doing! You’re killin’ it. XO, your friend. 

Want to be a next-level best friend?

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This post was written by Nicole Nettell. Nicole is a sobriety advocate and the writer behind Everseeking Copy. To work with her, visit www.nicolewritesit.com.